Tell Me Not To Slip Away.

I see your rational behind it. I've gone so far and now, why must I break down and discontinue this surge? Yeah, it sucks. Retaining a year has disastrous effects even just by bringing it up. But is it because of the money? Is it because of the lose of pride? Is it because you just don't want to see me stuck in the same situation? All I ask is your understanding.

I don't want to just pass. I don't want to just get into a poly or a jc. I want to excel. I want to be the best. I want to score. And right now, by telling me that I must work hard to cover 2 years' work in 2 weeks, I can't fully flap my wings. You must understand the stress I am holding. I can't focus today. I can't focus tommorow. Work is unlimited. I am trapped in the expectations of others and myself. I want to know what is stored if I take this path. I want to know that you will be supporting me. I don't want to fail. I want to be better.

So I shall not see my punishment as I enter ite. NEVER. I will see my punishment as I lower myself below the ranks of this pride. I will use these skills to built a catapult to lunge myself into the blur future. I will not take this.

If you understand me tell me that I should take this challenge and if I ever reach below the mark, you will be there telling me to retake it. Tell me to face my fears, stare it in the eyes and crush it. And that, I will be in my full potential. Realise my potential. Realise what I could do.

I don't want to slip away. Catch me Mother, please.