Fear Me, My Fears!

Judgement Day. A day that has long since been a threat. Never have I thought that the cogs of fate would turn this way. They say, nothing can stop it and that I say is true. All I can say right now is that I must not stay rooted in a matter. If I ever get bored of life, I will be overcoming them frequently. It's not an isolated task. It's a series of events that are stringed together so that we will remember that life is not a challenge. Overcoming it is one, but the effects hides a sharp dagger, ready to sink into your unprotected back. Before you know it, everything could turn back to the worst again.

It seems to be a blur as it happened about more than 2 years ago. During that time, I never heard a thing called 'feelings'. Emotionless. Heartless. I became Communism. My life became a play off a teenage novel that expressed life's difficulties in reality. Determining what's right was hard as the evil lurks every corner. A simple adoring with a twist of romance and a sizzle of life, it became a mountain with weak foundations. It was rarity for me to have someone smiling at you. She became my perfect half, outdoing me in every way. She became my imagination, fuelling my body to become the best. But, she became my reason to live. She smiled at me. : )

I wanted to be perfect for her, thinking that it would propel me into her heart. Haha. Just looking back brings me to a question: Why did I think of that? Haha. But as I tried to spread myself to become the best in all areas, I thinned and thinned. And the cloth that held me broke and i landed with a thud. Ever since that day, I was a just plague with constant failures. Never in my mind that she would accept me. Because I've done so much for her and to let her know that I've failed was a something I don't want to injure her. In a world of my own, I assumed.

And now, I've said my peace, settled the score and resolved my conflicts. She will be leaving the equation that has glued me into what I became in Sec 2. And with that equation, I will be on my way. But without her, how am I able to fit a term that suits her position? The answer is no. Nothing can replace her. So I plead today, for you to be my friend. For you to be my everything. You rock. x)

Your words purge my soul,
as I renewed in life.
Your touch heal my scars,
leaving the past and letting me move on.
Your smile makes my day,
even if the world betrayed me that day.
You are something so dear to me,
that I cannot lose.